Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Dream

I just woke up this morning from a dream that was so real I felt I had to write it down. This may not get published on my blog but I need to remember. I had just moved into a new house. New carpet and lots of space. The neighborhood association had come and decorated our front yard with lights spreading across all of the yards. White ropes of lights along with an angel standing. I remember turning to Chad and saying, "this is the first time I've lived in a house where they did that".

One scene in my dream had my mother in law, who passed away over 15 years ago, sitting beside me, stitching the hem on a quilt that was covering the bed in a guestroom. It was navy blue and white. I remember thinking, she must have made it at home and brought it to our new house to help us out. She always had so much love and strength. Then my sister in law was there and she was holding a baby. My mother in law said "Oh, did you hear, she's getting another baby soon." I thought to myself, "she must be either taking in foster children or adopting, since her children are grown.

I was aware in my dream of a trip to Nicaragua that my mother in law and sister in law were planning to take for a mission trip of some kind. I asked" Did you ever go to Nicaragua?" My mother in law replied, "No, I didn't go. Let me tell you why. Listen to the words of this song. She then began to sing a Keith Green song, with all of her heart. I began to sing with her because I love the song and knew the lyrics. As we were singing, a man walked by who I knew to be her pastor and just looked curiously at me.

She sang,
"Thank you Oh My Father, for giving us your son
And leaving your Spirit till the work on earth is done.
Thank you Oh My Father, for giving us your son
And leaving your Spirit till the work on earth is done.

Before my divorce, or before the end of our marriage, my husband's family were so much a part of my life. I loved them and their children so dearly. When I walked away from my husband, I felt I had to walk away from them as well. How could they be his sisters and mine at the same time? We've spoken a few times since then but not often. I keep up with my nieces and nephews through my kids and hear about marriages and births. But I've always felt that I needed to write a letter to each of my sister in laws and maybe they could pass it on to their children sometime.

Was my mother in law communicating to me from heaven? If so, what was she trying to say to me? or better yet, what was God saying to me through this dream? It made me realize what a constant presence and strength she was before her death. I pray that I am that strength in my own children's lives or at least showing them the way to the One who is their strength.

This has really reached deep in my heart, as I'm sitting here in tears as I write. I feel desperate to know the meaning. I had a mission to accomplish leading up to and during and after my divorce and I have always felt as though I ran from it. Now it seems too late.

I think I will write on forgiveness next. It's been on my heart to write about for awhile and I've learned so many new truths that would have changed my life 12 years ago, had I known then.

Lord, I give to you the things left undone on this earth, the words left unsaid. Thank you for leaving your Spirit with us to accomplish your work. Let me be a part of that work.

2 Timothy 1:6-8 (The Message)

5-7That precious memory triggers another: your honest faith—and what a rich faith it is, handed down from your grandmother Lois to your mother Eunice, and now to you! And the special gift of ministry you received when I laid hands on you and prayed—keep that ablaze! God doesn't want us to be shy with his gifts, but bold and loving and sensible.

8-10So don't be embarrassed to speak up for our Master or for me, his prisoner. Take your share of suffering for the Message along with the rest of us. We can only keep on going, after all, by the power of God, who first saved us and then called us to this holy work. We had nothing to do with it. It was all his idea, a gift prepared for us in Jesus long before we knew anything about it. But we know it now. Since the appearance of our Savior, nothing could be plainer: death defeated, life vindicated in a steady blaze of light, all through the work of Jesus.

If you are reading this, you are witness to a miracle. As I was writing my last paragraph, I thought I wanted to include the verse in the Bible that talks about a gift of power, love and self control, but couldn't remember where it was. I looked it up in Bible Gateway.com and read it in several versions.

My Mother in law's name is Lois. . .

All my love and prayers to you as you go about your day. Thanks for visiting my blog and allowing me to share with you.

3 comments:

  1. sometimes I too wonder about dreams and if they are influenced by God. I have had dreams on occasion when I definitely thought so. About a month ago, my husband and I both dreamt of his dead father on the same night...they were different dreams, but related in many ways and both offered comfort and reassurance. Lois sounds like she was a wonderful mother-in-law and you were blessed to have her in your life...sometimes we need to make changes in order to feel happiness, but if there is love in your heart for some of your ex-husband's family members I think it would be wonderful to write them a letter and share that with them. Life is too short to keep ideas locked up in the mind...let them spring forth and blossom. Your post touched my heart, I could feel you opening up and sharing bits and pieces of that inner you...if you ever want to "talk", my email door is open to you anytime...well, my home door would be too if you lived closer! I would love to sit and share coffee and coversation with you. You have a sweet spirit Karen and I thank you for sharing it most genuinely.

    wishing you love in your day ~
    Joni

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  2. It's amazing to me the steps that God takes to get our attention. Thanks for sharing your witness with the world!

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