In writing my blog, some days I wish it to be all sunshine and light. I think maybe I shouldn't tackle difficult issues facing women and simply share my victories and joys made possible because of my faith in Christ and His redemptive work in my life.
Some days I am reminded of the struggles of my own past and of women who are facing those same struggles today. My heart is filled with regret for those difficult days and for the lack of direction, the feeling of being caught between two extremes that were impossible to live out. Where do you go from there? I'm writing about being in a difficult marriage, having tried counseling and prayer, where do you go?
For me, my relationship with God was so wrapped up in my marriage. My identity was wrapped up in my marriage. How do you begin to separate the strands of your heart? How do you hold on to the One relationship you need for all time, and let go of the destructive one. It is a very heart wrenching process and one that I failed at miserably. This can be a very vulnerable time and a time to guard your heart very carefully so as to not walk away from God at the same time you feel you must walk away from your marriage. Is there a way to hold your spouse accountable and protect your home and family? Maybe there is a chance to restore the marriage through this process. Is there a way to know you have tried everything possible and because of that, you can walk away with your dignity intact and know that God is with you in the process?
I felt the need to write about this because I discovered a book and a seminar dealing with this situation. As I read excerpts from the book, tears ran down my face as I longed to have had this support at the time I needed it. The good news is that it is here to help women now. I pray that God will be with you if you are facing this in your life. God loves you and values you. You have great worth in His eyes and He will fight for you.
Do not be afraid of them; the LORD your God himself will fight for you."