Monday, September 15, 2008


In writing my blog, some days I wish it to be all sunshine and light. I think maybe I shouldn't tackle difficult issues facing women and simply share my victories and joys made possible because of my faith in Christ and His redemptive work in my life.

Some days I am reminded of the struggles of my own past and of women who are facing those same struggles today. My heart is filled with regret for those difficult days and for the lack of direction, the feeling of being caught between two extremes that were impossible to live out. Where do you go from there? I'm writing about being in a difficult marriage, having tried counseling and prayer, where do you go?

For me, my relationship with God was so wrapped up in my marriage. My identity was wrapped up in my marriage. How do you begin to separate the strands of your heart? How do you hold on to the One relationship you need for all time, and let go of the destructive one. It is a very heart wrenching process and one that I failed at miserably. This can be a very vulnerable time and a time to guard your heart very carefully so as to not walk away from God at the same time you feel you must walk away from your marriage. Is there a way to hold your spouse accountable and protect your home and family? Maybe there is a chance to restore the marriage through this process. Is there a way to know you have tried everything possible and because of that, you can walk away with your dignity intact and know that God is with you in the process?

I felt the need to write about this because I discovered a book and a seminar dealing with this situation. As I read excerpts from the book, tears ran down my face as I longed to have had this support at the time I needed it. The good news is that it is here to help women now. I pray that God will be with you if you are facing this in your life. God loves you and values you. You have great worth in His eyes and He will fight for you.

Do not be afraid of them; the LORD your God himself will fight for you."
Deuteronomy 3:22


Sally said...

Karen, thank you for posting this today. I will check into the book, and perhaps order it for my daughter. She may be facing divorce in the near future, and is hurting so badly right now.

Sending hugs your way. :)

Donna said...

I am so sorry for the hurt that you have gone through. How wonderful for you to share a resource that provides some needed insight for others that will travel the journey.

I've gone through a bitter divorce and know the deep pains all too well. But I know that I chose wisely to admit the mistake and forgive myself. After the healing, my life has been wonderful ever since.

Anonymous said...

I can feel the pain you're dealing with by just reading your blog. I am praying to God for complete healing and deliverance. Be strong and may that strength be a living witness of the Lord's love and faithfulness. Remember that you are one of the Lord's handpiece not only for your generation but for the next generation.

You are always an encouragement to me. Your words are preparing me for the future in dealing with things and in regards to marriage life. I am not preparing for the complications of divorce though but for a happy married life..being able to withstand any circumstances that may arise in the future.

Thank you and please keep on writing.

You have written wisdom that comes from the just don't know how it helped me.

I would like to hug/embrace you, mom:)

Your daughter in faith,

Leigh Anne

Kathy C. said...

Karen, that was very heartfelt and open. Divorce is an extremely painful thing and no one can really know that pain unless they actually been through it themselves. Blessings. :)